is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
