So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
