worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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