The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
