How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
