we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
