so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
