apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
