his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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