i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I feel great
I just peed on a car
They should really pass out barf bags in church
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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