dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Drunk is not a location!
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
