i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
