I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
