yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
