She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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