So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
