let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
