So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
