you guys were way drunker than both of me
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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