Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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