i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
