Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
what day is it and did you see me today?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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