the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
