i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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