i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
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It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
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