I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
