kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
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