you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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