Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
