Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
