That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
