He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
We had to coat check the pizza.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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