Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
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