Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
