high people should be assigned attendants
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
