BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
