So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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