From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
