I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
