Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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