Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
