you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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