i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
She said her name was "party"
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
