okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
