I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize