We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
