I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
