Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
