we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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