I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
They are going to name an STD after you.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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